








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 604 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 209 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 103 matches | ||
| Wingman | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4162 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,931 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5100 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2952 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3829 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3050 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,240,382 of utility $203 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 374 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Samppa | 49% | 45 |
| #2 | Dullerturtle | 49% | 35 |
| #3 | jelloeh | 45% | 133 |
| #4 | Röökiboss | 44% | 45 |
| #5 | 30sekRipe | 44% | 316 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Nukku-Pasi | 42% | 279 |
| #8 | kace | 40% | 40 |
| #9 | Hovikuski | 37% | 51 |
| #10 | rafal | 37% | 222 |
| #11 | Small M | 29% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 30sekRipe | 23 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | joe | 18 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | rafal | 10 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Nukku-Pasi | 9 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Hovikuski | 6 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rafal | 934 | 0.20 | 19 min |
| #2 | 30sekRipe | 820 | 0.13 | 20 min |
| #3 | joe | 480 | 0.13 | 16 min |
| #4 | Nukku-Pasi | 367 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| #5 | jelloeh | 181 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | joe | +6.55 | 91 | 79 |
| #2 | 30sekRipe | +0.20 | 58 | 67 |
| #3 | jelloeh | -0.48 | 48 | 48 |
| #4 | Dullerturtle | -0.78 | 57 | 67 |
| #5 | kace | -1.11 | 56 | 62 |





