








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2274 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 496 matches | ||
| Premier | 481 matches | ||
| Faceit | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Wingman | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 80 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




94 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
14367 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 41,377 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 18174 | 44% |
| Smokes | 11519 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 6273 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 5411 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,687,378 of utility $69 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 686 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Betrox | 63% | 89 |
| #2 | vladimus | 62% | 167 |
| #3 | Fleso21 | 60% | 288 |
| #4 | OYSHI | 59% | 403 |
| #5 | fAME- | 59% | 655 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | K0han- | 56% | 294 |
| #9 | Freeman*- | 56% | 305 |
| #10 | castlej | 56% | 79 |
| #11 | NETVOR | 56% | 63 |
| #12 | PLEXAR! | 52% | 175 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fAME- | 83 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | Fleso21 | 32 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | K0han- | 28 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | Betrox | 17 | 0.0095 |
| #5 | Un4gettableMatt | 14 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fAME- | 1200 | 0.09 | 29 min |
| #2 | OYSHI | 1014 | 0.13 | 21 min |
| #3 | Fleso21 | 935 | 0.16 | 23 min |
| #4 | K0han- | 687 | 0.12 | 17 min |
| #5 | Un4gettableMatt | 529 | 0.12 | 15 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fAME- | +2.62 | 89 | 61 |
| #2 | headshot machine | +2.42 | 81 | 65 |
| #3 | K0han- | +1.92 | 87 | 64 |
| #4 | tyler durden | +1.82 | 79 | 58 |
| #5 | Un4gettableMatt | +1.20 | 77 | 66 |





