








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 696 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 229 matches | ||
| Premier | 132 matches | ||
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Wingman | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6114 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,054 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5406 | 25% |
| Smokes | 6027 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4681 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 5940 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,217,498 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 571 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Freeman*- | 63% | 111 |
| #2 | vladimus | 62% | 66 |
| #3 | fAME- | 62% | 356 |
| #4 | Fleso21 | 60% | 231 |
| #5 | OYSHI | 59% | 211 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Betrox | 52% | 73 |
| #12 | Adr1XD | 48% | 66 |
| #13 | matufk0 | 48% | 31 |
| #14 | Pingo | 48% | 62 |
| #15 | CumBustER2014 | 44% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fAME- | 33 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | Fleso21 | 20 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | headshot machine | 15 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | CumBustER2014 | 9 | 0.0104 |
| #5 | OYSHI | 8 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fleso21 | 784 | 0.18 | 17 min |
| #2 | headshot machine | 762 | 0.17 | 20 min |
| #3 | fAME- | 629 | 0.09 | 14 min |
| #4 | OYSHI | 607 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| #5 | PLEXAR! | 262 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | K0han- | +2.99 | 86 | 66 |
| #2 | Un4gettableMatt | +2.26 | 79 | 68 |
| #3 | fAME- | +2.19 | 89 | 63 |
| #4 | headshot machine | +1.96 | 81 | 63 |
| #5 | tyler durden | +1.65 | 81 | 50 |





