








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 243 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 238 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4513 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,050 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1534 | 17% |
| Smokes | 3199 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 3372 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 945 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,816,686 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 216 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | πθΆ
η΅Άζγγπγ¦γγ | 53% | 32 |
| #2 | kaze (broken keyboard) | 52% | 117 |
| #3 | word.exe | 48% | 194 |
| #4 | Matchiew.cc | 47% | 126 |
| #5 | onedrive.exe | 46% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | kaze (broken keyboard) | 52% | 117 |
| #3 | word.exe | 48% | 194 |
| #4 | Matchiew.cc | 47% | 126 |
| #5 | onedrive.exe | 46% | 37 |
| #6 | 1m4ginary | 36% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | word.exe | 28 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | kaze (broken keyboard) | 22 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | Matchiew.cc | 14 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | 1m4ginary | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | onedrive.exe | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | word.exe | 743 | 0.18 | 20 min |
| #2 | kaze (broken keyboard) | 395 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #3 | Matchiew.cc | 144 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | 1m4ginary | 57 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | πθΆ
η΅Άζγγπγ¦γγ | 36 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kaze (broken keyboard) | +3.71 | 68 | 48 |
| #2 | powerpoint.exe | +1.45 | 54 | 52 |
| #3 | word.exe | +1.22 | 64 | 67 |
| #4 | πθΆ
η΅Άζγγπγ¦γγ | -1.50 | 26 | 33 |
| #5 | 1m4ginary | -2.21 | 31 | 44 |





