








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2346 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 485 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 359 matches | ||
| Premier | 353 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 280 matches | ||
| Faceit | 235 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 201 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 192 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 135 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 158 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
20081 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 110,925 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 35461 | 32% |
| Smokes | 28868 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 19569 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 27027 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $6,181,609 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1325 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪Kalu | 70% | 193 |
| #2 | Lebiiis | 67% | 415 |
| #3 | Esdeath | 66% | 642 |
| #4 | karriSツ | 65% | 628 |
| #5 | Jarii | 64% | 1277 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Riisi | 55% | 249 |
| #13 | Nik Varg | 54% | 164 |
| #14 | s4mu | 54% | 148 |
| #15 | ikke | 53% | 200 |
| #16 | JalluPena | 51% | 466 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jarii | 35 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | JalluPena | 35 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | karriSツ | 32 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | ✪Kalu | 14 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | ipsu | 12 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Esdeath | 2688 | 0.21 | 79 min |
| #2 | JalluPena | 2128 | 0.23 | 59 min |
| #3 | Jarii | 1331 | 0.05 | 37 min |
| #4 | Tommux | 851 | 0.11 | 25 min |
| #5 | s4mu | 741 | 0.25 | 18 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JalluPena | +3.52 | 75 | 73 |
| #2 | Esdeath | +2.56 | 77 | 77 |
| #3 | ✪Kalu | +2.54 | 76 | 69 |
| #4 | Jarii | +2.40 | 67 | 66 |
| #5 | ipsu | +1.75 | 71 | 63 |





