








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 565 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 112 matches | ||
| Premier | 53 matches | ||
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3035 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,146 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3772 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2571 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2101 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2702 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,111,298 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 828 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vladimus | 62% | 60 |
| #2 | Betrox | 60% | 30 |
| #3 | Fleso21 | 59% | 79 |
| #4 | Un4gettableMatt | 53% | 96 |
| #5 | fAME- | 53% | 232 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Freeman*- | 51% | 164 |
| #8 | OYSHI | 51% | 170 |
| #9 | K0han- | 51% | 92 |
| #10 | tyler durden | 48% | 83 |
| #11 | NETVOR | 37% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fAME- | 34 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | headshot machine | 17 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | K0han- | 10 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | OYSHI | 8 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Fleso21 | 8 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | headshot machine | 606 | 0.18 | 16 min |
| #2 | fAME- | 411 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #3 | OYSHI | 387 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | Un4gettableMatt | 256 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #5 | Fleso21 | 245 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | headshot machine | +2.39 | 80 | 62 |
| #2 | K0han- | +2.30 | 82 | 64 |
| #3 | fAME- | +1.80 | 85 | 64 |
| #4 | tyler durden | +1.69 | 81 | 51 |
| #5 | Betrox | +0.76 | 62 | 57 |





