








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 55 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 144 matches | ||
| Premier | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4581 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,122 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3635 | 36% |
| Smokes | 3467 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2472 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 548 | 5% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,118,566 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 119 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Milpert | 57% | 28 |
| #2 | Broseff | 45% | 112 |
| #3 | DizzyWallins | 45% | 354 |
| #4 | doc shifty | 42% | 151 |
| #5 | ΛBBIƬƬY BΛBBIƬƬY | 41% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Fatal | 40% | 102 |
| #7 | Leo2k | 40% | 58 |
| #8 | Chiken | 39% | 36 |
| #9 | ✪ Light The Beam | 38% | 86 |
| #10 | theoriginalmres | 32% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Broseff | 28 | 0.0128 |
| #2 | DizzyWallins | 22 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Fatal | 13 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | ✪ Light The Beam | 11 | 0.0062 |
| #5 | doc shifty | 7 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DizzyWallins | 632 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #2 | Broseff | 205 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #3 | doc shifty | 203 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | Fatal | 202 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | ✪ Light The Beam | 164 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Leo2k | +1.71 | 68 | 65 |
| #2 | Broseff | +1.42 | 48 | 33 |
| #3 | ✪ Light The Beam | +1.09 | 57 | 65 |
| #4 | ❤Poochie❤ | +0.17 | 52 | 47 |
| #5 | ΛBBIƬƬY BΛBBIƬƬY | +0.11 | 66 | 21 |





