








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 634 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 292 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4918 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,200 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2088 | 25% |
| Smokes | 4405 | 54% |
| HE Grenades | 642 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 1065 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $949,145 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 303 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Leo2k | 49% | 73 |
| #2 | Broseff | 48% | 192 |
| #3 | Fatal | 45% | 132 |
| #4 | DizzyWallins | 44% | 360 |
| #5 | Milpert | 42% | 116 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Milpert | 42% | 116 |
| #6 | ❤Poochie❤ | 42% | 151 |
| #7 | ✪ Light The Beam | 40% | 88 |
| #8 | ΛBBIƬƬY BΛBBIƬƬY | 38% | 65 |
| #9 | theoriginalmres | 37% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Broseff | 37 | 0.0096 |
| #2 | DizzyWallins | 19 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | Fatal | 16 | 0.0061 |
| #4 | ❤Poochie❤ | 8 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | ✪ Light The Beam | 8 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DizzyWallins | 727 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| #2 | Milpert | 373 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #3 | Broseff | 363 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #4 | ❤Poochie❤ | 297 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #5 | Fatal | 215 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Leo2k | +2.98 | 73 | 63 |
| #2 | Broseff | +1.49 | 50 | 46 |
| #3 | ✪ Light The Beam | +1.26 | 59 | 64 |
| #4 | ❤Poochie❤ | +0.65 | 50 | 44 |
| #5 | DizzyWallins | +0.50 | 47 | 57 |





