








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 550 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 189 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 91 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 79 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




53 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4836 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,313 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4426 | 23% |
| Smokes | 7207 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 3838 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3842 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,955,477 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1511 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chip3.0 | 52% | 103 |
| #2 | Leo2k | 50% | 108 |
| #3 | DizzyWallins | 47% | 257 |
| #4 | Milpert | 47% | 30 |
| #5 | Broseff | 41% | 150 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Broseff | 41% | 150 |
| #6 | doc shifty | 40% | 88 |
| #7 | ❤Poochie❤ | 38% | 86 |
| #8 | Fatal | 34% | 90 |
| #9 | theoriginalmres | 22% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Broseff | 21 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | DizzyWallins | 15 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Fatal | 10 | 0.0055 |
| #4 | ❤Poochie❤ | 8 | 0.0046 |
| #5 | doc shifty | 4 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chip3.0 | 641 | 0.29 | 15 min |
| #2 | DizzyWallins | 484 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #3 | Broseff | 339 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #4 | Leo2k | 279 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #5 | ❤Poochie❤ | 143 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chip3.0 | +3.20 | 65 | 71 |
| #2 | Leo2k | +1.97 | 74 | 65 |
| #3 | ✪ Light The Beam | +0.73 | 58 | 62 |
| #4 | Broseff | +0.23 | 45 | 47 |
| #5 | ❤Poochie❤ | -0.34 | 47 | 49 |





