










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 172 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 70 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
883 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,544 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 417 | 16% |
| Smokes | 872 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 847 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 408 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $752,190 of utility $293 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dookie | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | Eldenring Mule | 67% | 9 |
| #3 | omega | 54% | 28 |
| #4 | Moosey Moose | 50% | 24 |
| #5 | LeeroyMcGee | 42% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Eldenring Mule | 67% | 9 |
| #3 | omega | 54% | 28 |
| #4 | Moosey Moose | 50% | 24 |
| #5 | LeeroyMcGee | 42% | 26 |
| #6 | Mr. Ricky | 38% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | omega | 2 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | Moosey Moose | 2 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | LeeroyMcGee | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | omega | 43 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #2 | LeeroyMcGee | 42 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #3 | Eldenring Mule | 29 | 0.16 | 0 min |
| #4 | Mr. Ricky | 27 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Moosey Moose | 11 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | omega | +2.92 | 80 | 59 |
| #2 | Eldenring Mule | +0.67 | 84 | 55 |
| #3 | Zionq | -0.06 | 61 | 41 |
| #4 | LeeroyMcGee | -0.83 | 64 | 46 |
| #5 | Moosey Moose | -0.98 | 47 | 36 |





