










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 136 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 163 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 101 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1736 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,709 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1575 | 33% |
| Smokes | 794 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 1908 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 432 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,008,030 of utility $214 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 388 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | DOGGIE | 44% | 18 |
| #7 | Mr. Ricky | 44% | 80 |
| #8 | Zionq | 42% | 26 |
| #9 | Jon | 42% | 12 |
| #10 | Two | 27% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr. Ricky | 91 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #2 | DOGGIE | 63 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #3 | omega | 58 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | Two | 58 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | Moosey Moose | 49 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jon | +2.91 | 83 | 38 |
| #2 | omega | +2.65 | 79 | 55 |
| #3 | Crxmson | +0.41 | 39 | 46 |
| #4 | Two | +0.32 | 64 | 58 |
| #5 | Mr. Ricky | -0.06 | 57 | 36 |





