








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 271 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1195 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,016 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 573 | 19% |
| Smokes | 799 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 961 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 683 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $687,039 of utility $269 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1310 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dookie | 69% | 16 |
| #2 | Crxmson | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | Eldenring Mule | 54% | 24 |
| #4 | Zionq | 54% | 28 |
| #5 | LeeroyMcGee | 48% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | LeeroyMcGee | 48% | 56 |
| #6 | Moosey Moose | 47% | 62 |
| #7 | Two | 43% | 14 |
| #8 | Mr. Ricky | 40% | 47 |
| #9 | DOGGIE | 11% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moosey Moose | 10 | 0.0078 |
| #2 | LeeroyMcGee | 6 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | Mr. Ricky | 4 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | DOGGIE | 2 | 0.0134 |
| #5 | Zionq | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LeeroyMcGee | 135 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #2 | Eldenring Mule | 78 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #3 | Mr. Ricky | 56 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Moosey Moose | 48 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #5 | Two | 46 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | omega | +2.77 | 79 | 58 |
| #2 | Zionq | +1.24 | 64 | 43 |
| #3 | Crxmson | +0.21 | 33 | 48 |
| #4 | Two | -0.58 | 62 | 51 |
| #5 | Mr. Ricky | -1.30 | 59 | 27 |





