








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 431 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 151 matches | ||
| Faceit | 101 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 31 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4604 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,948 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2533 | 23% |
| Smokes | 3536 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1866 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 3013 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,260,195 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 228 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KR1ST0F | 72% | 113 |
| #2 | barry | 66% | 196 |
| #3 | w0RLD | 63% | 201 |
| #4 | Leon. | 63% | 54 |
| #5 | preeti.exe | 63% | 158 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | うずまきsparkling | 55% | 38 |
| #11 | ✪JOHN ANDERSON | 48% | 27 |
| #12 | kANCHAtORY | 45% | 29 |
| #13 | Sir VapesALot | 44% | 25 |
| #14 | -respiii- | 39% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | barry | 47 | 0.0117 |
| #2 | Widower | 34 | 0.0140 |
| #3 | preeti.exe | 28 | 0.0083 |
| #4 | w0RLD | 23 | 0.0055 |
| #5 | Leon. | 7 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Widower | 596 | 0.25 | 15 min |
| #2 | barry | 431 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #3 | preeti.exe | 387 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | w0RLD | 276 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #5 | kANCHAtORY | 210 | 0.32 | 5 min |





