








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 67 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1662 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,287 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1800 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1507 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 845 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1135 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $245,258 of utility $81 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 159 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TPPH | 63% | 57 |
| #2 | Vibe Check | 63% | 8 |
| #3 | DROEFTOETER | 63% | 8 |
| #4 | Williamo | 61% | 28 |
| #5 | -staRiTTo ? | 60% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Klutch | 54% | 67 |
| #8 | Kappie | 51% | 79 |
| #9 | Reprotted | 50% | 8 |
| #10 | Pinwin | 44% | 25 |
| #11 | vaece | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kappie | 12 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | TPPH | 5 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | Pinwin | 4 | 0.0079 |
| #4 | Thompie | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Williamo | 2 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Klutch | 291 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #2 | Kappie | 187 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | TPPH | 150 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | Williamo | 124 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #5 | Thompie | 106 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Klutch | +1.80 | 91 | 66 |
| #2 | DusntAxe | +1.55 | 90 | 58 |
| #3 | DROEFTOETER | +1.34 | 91 | 47 |
| #4 | Reprotted | +0.53 | 79 | 39 |
| #5 | -staRiTTo ? | +0.43 | 75 | 88 |





