








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 493 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 293 matches | ||
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4746 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,572 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3513 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4171 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2869 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 4019 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,078,334 of utility $207 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 169 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DusntAxe | 63% | 57 |
| #2 | Gloeiii | 53% | 49 |
| #3 | Klutch | 53% | 144 |
| #4 | Kappie | 53% | 361 |
| #5 | Vibe Check | 51% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Klutch | 53% | 144 |
| #4 | Kappie | 53% | 361 |
| #5 | Vibe Check | 51% | 85 |
| #6 | Thompie | 47% | 195 |
| #7 | Williamo | 45% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kappie | 29 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | Thompie | 8 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Gloeiii | 8 | 0.0077 |
| #4 | Vibe Check | 7 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | DusntAxe | 5 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kappie | 1044 | 0.13 | 22 min |
| #2 | Klutch | 665 | 0.22 | 19 min |
| #3 | Thompie | 586 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #4 | DusntAxe | 310 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| #5 | Vibe Check | 266 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Klutch | +2.80 | 90 | 68 |
| #2 | DusntAxe | +1.38 | 88 | 60 |
| #3 | Gloeiii | +0.57 | 91 | 50 |
| #4 | TPPH | +0.09 | 76 | 59 |
| #5 | Kappie | -0.25 | 85 | 55 |





