








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 362 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 294 matches | ||
| Premier | 109 matches | ||
| Wingman | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5118 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,528 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3454 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4019 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2753 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 4302 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,636,252 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 116 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gingjaa | 58% | 65 |
| #2 | Pleb | 58% | 48 |
| #3 | Intense | 57% | 106 |
| #4 | Trees. | 56% | 294 |
| #5 | Bennyquan | 55% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | cole | 53% | 100 |
| #8 | Glase | 53% | 168 |
| #9 | Vinegar Mix | 53% | 59 |
| #10 | Alo | 52% | 138 |
| #11 | stecs | 41% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trees. | 6 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | Alo | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Intense | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | stecs | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | Glase | 2 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trees. | 947 | 0.15 | 25 min |
| #2 | Glase | 874 | 0.25 | 29 min |
| #3 | Alo | 440 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #4 | Gingjaa | 364 | 0.26 | 10 min |
| #5 | Pleb | 312 | 0.30 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gingjaa | +2.14 | 78 | 63 |
| #2 | Pleb | +0.99 | 76 | 61 |
| #3 | cole | +0.93 | 79 | 64 |
| #4 | Outlier | +0.56 | 73 | 64 |
| #5 | Glase | +0.52 | 75 | 76 |





