








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1408 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 724 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 540 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




91 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8837 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 43,789 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 15741 | 36% |
| Smokes | 9916 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 10439 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 7693 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,107,901 of utility $65 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1087 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | muussi | 63% | 54 |
| #2 | ikke | 52% | 58 |
| #3 | havosen tavja | 50% | 68 |
| #4 | Joqqu5 | 49% | 74 |
| #5 | JalluPena | 47% | 134 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ikke | 52% | 58 |
| #3 | havosen tavja | 50% | 68 |
| #4 | Joqqu5 | 49% | 74 |
| #5 | JalluPena | 47% | 134 |
| #6 | Nik Varg | 40% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JalluPena | 9 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | Nik Varg | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | havosen tavja | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | muussi | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Joqqu5 | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JalluPena | 589 | 0.22 | 16 min |
| #2 | muussi | 201 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #3 | ikke | 132 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | Joqqu5 | 129 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | havosen tavja | 60 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JalluPena | +3.86 | 72 | 76 |
| #2 | Pale | +2.13 | 57 | 86 |
| #3 | muussi | +0.57 | 68 | 79 |
| #4 | ikke | +0.12 | 65 | 63 |
| #5 | havosen tavja | -0.70 | 66 | 49 |





