








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 129 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 104 matches | ||
| Premier | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




82 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5203 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,908 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1494 | 17% |
| Smokes | 2435 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2126 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2853 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,064,423 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 382 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Schneider | 70% | 63 |
| #2 | RAZR | 53% | 55 |
| #3 | Colin | 52% | 435 |
| #4 | SPECTER | 49% | 292 |
| #5 | raiiin | 48% | 379 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Colin | 52% | 435 |
| #4 | SPECTER | 49% | 292 |
| #5 | raiiin | 48% | 379 |
| #6 | Napp | 45% | 301 |
| #7 | OddHawk | 35% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Colin | 42 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Napp | 37 | 0.0062 |
| #3 | raiiin | 35 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | SPECTER | 19 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | Schneider | 2 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Napp | 1975 | 0.33 | 38 min |
| #2 | raiiin | 1145 | 0.15 | 32 min |
| #3 | SPECTER | 909 | 0.16 | 25 min |
| #4 | Colin | 652 | 0.07 | 15 min |
| #5 | Schneider | 91 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RAZR | +4.06 | 87 | 52 |
| #2 | Colin | +1.90 | 66 | 57 |
| #3 | raiiin | +1.41 | 62 | 63 |
| #4 | Schneider | +1.09 | 75 | 37 |
| #5 | SPECTER | +0.71 | 71 | 65 |





