








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 54 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1442 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 763 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 63 | 8% |
| Smokes | 280 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 331 | 43% |
| Molotovs | 89 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $722,480 of utility $184 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| 79% | 39 | ||
| 62% | 13 | ||
| #3 | Ikigami | 57% | 28 |
| #4 | YungBloodShitta24k | 57% | 23 |
| 52% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| 23 | 0.0185 | ||
| 12 | 0.0166 | ||
| 12 | 0.0252 | ||
| #4 | klyE | 9 | 0.0163 |
| #5 | Jon | 8 | 0.0089 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 258 | 0.21 | 2 min | ||
| 196 | 0.27 | 2 min | ||
| #3 | cur1ous | 178 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| 160 | 0.34 | 1 min | ||
| 156 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jon | +3.57 | 84 | 39 |
| +3.52 | 81 | 19 | ||
| #3 | klyE | +2.19 | 82 | 43 |
| #4 | hot titties | +2.17 | 82 | 26 |
| +2.16 | 81 | 35 |





