








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 985 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 82 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Premier | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




67 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4831 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,099 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3085 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1823 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1960 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2231 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,202,674 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 20 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| 70% | 23 | ||
| 65% | 23 | ||
| 60% | 25 | ||
| #4 | SaLaMi | 59% | 130 |
| #5 | Deadly | 57% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| 26 | 0.0190 | ||
| #2 | SaLaMi | 17 | 0.0067 |
| 14 | 0.0358 | ||
| 13 | 0.0327 | ||
| #5 | JayRod | 9 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SaLaMi | 989 | 0.39 | 26 min |
| #2 | JayRod | 681 | 0.34 | 19 min |
| 316 | 0.23 | 4 min | ||
| 94 | 0.24 | 1 min | ||
| 92 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jon | +2.44 | 82 | 33 |
| #2 | JayRod | +2.09 | 68 | 81 |
| #3 | SaLaMi | +1.91 | 71 | 82 |
| #4 | Ikigami | +1.47 | 69 | 62 |
| +1.39 | 82 | 31 |





