








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1150 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 592 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 70 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




79 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6378 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,835 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12887 | 36% |
| Smokes | 10208 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4838 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 7902 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,204,718 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 244 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HYPA HYPA | 58% | 163 |
| #2 | Higori | 55% | 146 |
| #3 | iron$kull | 52% | 124 |
| #4 | knesch | 51% | 79 |
| #5 | Sobrinho Chupex | 50% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iron$kull | 18 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | HYPA HYPA | 12 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | Black Alien | 12 | 0.0069 |
| #4 | chinela | 11 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | louitts-- | 9 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Higori | 866 | 0.29 | 25 min |
| #2 | HYPA HYPA | 549 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #3 | Gui97gps | 513 | 0.18 | 14 min |
| #4 | Black Alien | 375 | 0.22 | 10 min |
| #5 | iron$kull | 315 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Black Alien | +2.04 | 81 | 60 |
| #2 | louitts-- | +1.95 | 73 | 39 |
| #3 | Higori | +1.64 | 78 | 72 |
| #4 | HYPA HYPA | +1.37 | 45 | 65 |
| #5 | knesch | +1.31 | 51 | 48 |





