








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 256 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 305 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




54 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3021 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,591 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5037 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2201 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 4661 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 3692 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $841,096 of utility $76 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 72 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | knesch | 56% | 70 |
| #2 | math | 52% | 124 |
| #3 | モンスター fredin | 52% | 62 |
| #4 | Black Alien | 50% | 155 |
| #5 | HYPA HYPA | 50% | 267 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | louitts-- | 26 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | Black Alien | 21 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | chinela | 18 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | HYPA HYPA | 12 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | math | 12 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Higori | 1294 | 0.28 | 39 min |
| #2 | HYPA HYPA | 906 | 0.17 | 25 min |
| #3 | Black Alien | 705 | 0.22 | 18 min |
| #4 | math | 691 | 0.27 | 21 min |
| #5 | Gui97gps | 535 | 0.19 | 16 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | louitts-- | +2.72 | 78 | 40 |
| #2 | Black Alien | +2.67 | 83 | 62 |
| #3 | Higori | +1.24 | 78 | 74 |
| #4 | モンスター fredin | +1.17 | 65 | 54 |
| #5 | HYPA HYPA | +0.53 | 47 | 66 |





