








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 209 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 166 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 137 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 55 matches | ||
| Faceit | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




127 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6061 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,456 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7427 | 35% |
| Smokes | 4322 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 5401 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 4306 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,233,284 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 157 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | マーロン MVRL0 | 62% | 34 |
| #2 | Adobe After Effects 2024 | 59% | 34 |
| #3 | Cato | 56% | 34 |
| #4 | Sw1sh | 51% | 43 |
| #5 | Nano 7G | 49% | 116 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | hDr | 46% | 94 |
| #8 | ๖ۣۜℜaiτ.#✨ | 42% | 62 |
| #9 | ☠ Rockgoehre ☠ ♥ | 41% | 75 |
| #10 | Infinite Mage Lano | 38% | 68 |
| #11 | PhO.onix | 38% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .iS tHaT FoHrReLlE !? | 64 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | Infinite Mage Lano | 12 | 0.0078 |
| #3 | Nano 7G | 10 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | Sw1sh | 8 | 0.0093 |
| #5 | マーロン MVRL0 | 4 | 0.0059 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .iS tHaT FoHrReLlE !? | 653 | 0.07 | 15 min |
| #2 | hDr | 314 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| #3 | Nano 7G | 284 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | ☠ Rockgoehre ☠ ♥ | 116 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | Infinite Mage Lano | 100 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .iS tHaT FoHrReLlE !? | +4.58 | 98 | 57 |
| #2 | Adobe After Effects 2024 | +2.95 | 94 | 59 |
| #3 | マーロン MVRL0 | +1.70 | 75 | 54 |
| #4 | Sw1sh | +0.42 | 88 | 50 |
| #5 | Zitro | +0.36 | 80 | 65 |





