








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 910 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 651 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 136 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 27 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 140 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




79 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9201 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 56,918 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13948 | 25% |
| Smokes | 16730 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 15155 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 11085 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,867,173 of utility $64 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2420 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Pill Pusher Pushin' P | 47% | 539 |
| #11 | DisKineKteD | 46% | 261 |
| #12 | η♡να | 44% | 286 |
| #13 | Robby | 38% | 101 |
| #14 | Snacky1YT | 38% | 112 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pill Pusher Pushin' P | 128 | 0.0120 |
| #2 | T3rpboy | 78 | 0.0060 |
| #3 | η♡να | 60 | 0.0103 |
| #4 | T3rpboy2.0 | 41 | 0.0120 |
| #5 | Snacky1YT | 38 | 0.0170 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | T3rpboy | 1845 | 0.14 | 46 min |
| #2 | Pill Pusher Pushin' P | 1781 | 0.17 | 50 min |
| #3 | DisKineKteD | 881 | 0.16 | 26 min |
| #4 | BUNYON | 762 | 0.18 | 21 min |
| #5 | T3rpboy2.0 | 591 | 0.17 | 13 min |





