








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 309 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 361 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 71 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5154 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,386 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6897 | 36% |
| Smokes | 4874 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4814 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2801 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,100,109 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 225 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | T3rpboy2.0 | 53% | 45 |
| #2 | η♡να | 51% | 47 |
| #3 | Mizzer | 49% | 100 |
| #4 | dubois.charles | 49% | 197 |
| #5 | OMGScooter | 47% | 167 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Dogzilla | 46% | 142 |
| #9 | CtK | 45% | 29 |
| #10 | DisKineKteD | 39% | 38 |
| #11 | An Ethnic Group | 39% | 31 |
| #12 | Snacky1YT | 37% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OMGScooter | 26 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | Dogzilla | 20 | 0.0067 |
| #3 | Pill Pusher Pushin' P | 18 | 0.0151 |
| #4 | dubois.charles | 12 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | T3rpboy | 9 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dubois.charles | 715 | 0.17 | 18 min |
| #2 | OMGScooter | 427 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #3 | T3rpboy | 211 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #4 | Pill Pusher Pushin' P | 202 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #5 | Dogzilla | 201 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | T3rpboy2.0 | +2.53 | 37 | 70 |
| #2 | Pill Pusher Pushin' P | +1.41 | 75 | 64 |
| #3 | T3rpboy | +0.98 | 47 | 66 |
| #4 | dubois.charles | +0.86 | 54 | 67 |
| #5 | CtK | -0.05 | 63 | 58 |





