








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 281 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 292 matches | ||
| Premier | 93 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3492 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,193 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3040 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3488 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2209 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2456 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,377,503 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 41 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sly_albz | 71% | 45 |
| #2 | jo5ephj | 59% | 148 |
| #3 | tibs | 57% | 351 |
| #4 | OPSツ | 57% | 246 |
| #5 | Charlie_010 | 54% | 139 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | jo5ephj | 59% | 148 |
| #3 | tibs | 57% | 351 |
| #4 | OPSツ | 57% | 246 |
| #5 | Charlie_010 | 54% | 139 |
| #6 | dnx | 53% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Charlie_010 | 20 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | tibs | 15 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | dnx | 8 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | OPSツ | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | jo5ephj | 2 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tibs | 1181 | 0.16 | 36 min |
| #2 | OPSツ | 790 | 0.15 | 23 min |
| #3 | jo5ephj | 402 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #4 | Charlie_010 | 206 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #5 | dnx | 161 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tibs | +2.32 | 79 | 65 |
| #2 | OPSツ | +0.70 | 68 | 74 |
| #3 | sly_albz | +0.66 | 66 | 62 |
| #4 | jo5ephj | +0.26 | 64 | 59 |
| #5 | grogシ | -0.02 | 64 | 55 |





