








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 168 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 259 matches | ||
| Premier | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3504 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,913 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4549 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3389 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 4109 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3866 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $598,471 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 56 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sly_albz | 65% | 26 |
| #2 | Charlie_010 | 59% | 139 |
| #3 | tibs | 58% | 311 |
| #4 | dnx | 57% | 93 |
| #5 | grogシ | 57% | 246 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Charlie_010 | 59% | 139 |
| #3 | tibs | 58% | 311 |
| #4 | dnx | 57% | 93 |
| #5 | grogシ | 57% | 246 |
| #6 | jo5ephj | 56% | 140 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Charlie_010 | 16 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | tibs | 13 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | dnx | 10 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | grogシ | 9 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | jo5ephj | 2 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tibs | 1105 | 0.16 | 33 min |
| #2 | grogシ | 758 | 0.14 | 18 min |
| #3 | jo5ephj | 322 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #4 | Charlie_010 | 198 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #5 | dnx | 167 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tibs | +2.19 | 80 | 64 |
| #2 | OPSツ | +0.75 | 67 | 74 |
| #3 | jo5ephj | +0.19 | 63 | 58 |
| #4 | sly_albz | +0.11 | 63 | 54 |
| #5 | grogシ | -0.48 | 63 | 52 |





