








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 265 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 64 matches | ||
| Premier | 41 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2405 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,902 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3404 | 38% |
| Smokes | 2093 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1697 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1708 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $414,252 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 323 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Muckbucket | 73% | 15 |
| #2 | Glase | 59% | 81 |
| #3 | Trees. | 57% | 40 |
| #4 | Player | 57% | 49 |
| #5 | Bennyquan | 57% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stecs | 5 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Alo | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Player | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Gingjaa | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Trees. | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Glase | 472 | 0.27 | 16 min |
| #2 | Gingjaa | 296 | 0.30 | 8 min |
| #3 | Bennyquan | 200 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #4 | Alo | 188 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #5 | Trees. | 137 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gingjaa | +2.02 | 75 | 69 |
| #2 | Pleb | +1.77 | 78 | 59 |
| #3 | Glase | +0.90 | 76 | 80 |
| #4 | stecs | +0.79 | 69 | 61 |
| #5 | Intense | +0.65 | 75 | 62 |





