








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 125 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 96 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1460 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,583 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1727 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1675 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 943 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1238 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $609,627 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 55 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gingjaa | 61% | 67 |
| #2 | Intense | 58% | 53 |
| #3 | ᴹ ᵉ ʰ ˢ ᶦ ʳ ᵉ ッ | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | Pleb | 57% | 56 |
| #5 | Glase | 56% | 114 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stecs | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Glase | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | Gingjaa | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | Intense | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Pleb | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Glase | 693 | 0.27 | 23 min |
| #2 | Gingjaa | 416 | 0.27 | 12 min |
| #3 | Pleb | 365 | 0.31 | 9 min |
| #4 | Intense | 177 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | Trees. | 146 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sportz | +5.53 | 87 | 73 |
| #2 | Retro | +2.98 | 81 | 61 |
| #3 | Gingjaa | +2.25 | 80 | 72 |
| #4 | Glase | +0.52 | 77 | 82 |
| #5 | Alo | +0.46 | 75 | 56 |





