








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 704 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 227 matches | ||
| Premier | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5127 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,978 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2266 | 21% |
| Smokes | 3083 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2511 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3118 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,581,957 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 397 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | weine | 89% | 44 |
| #2 | fArt | 75% | 73 |
| #3 | wyan | 74% | 42 |
| #4 | shrooney | 69% | 39 |
| #5 | xtnkt | 69% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bango | 18 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | xtnkt | 15 | 0.0104 |
| #3 | wyan | 9 | 0.0108 |
| #4 | fArt | 8 | 0.0052 |
| #5 | weine | 8 | 0.0097 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bango | 595 | 0.17 | 16 min |
| #2 | fArt | 560 | 0.37 | 16 min |
| #3 | xtnkt | 426 | 0.29 | 10 min |
| #4 | n1 N1h0N | 283 | 0.18 | 9 min |
| #5 | traditions | 246 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | weine | +5.39 | 91 | 66 |
| #2 | skruubz | +3.51 | 86 | 76 |
| #3 | shrooney | +2.05 | 80 | 70 |
| #4 | n1 N1h0N | +2.00 | 91 | 67 |
| #5 | wyan | +1.92 | 89 | 71 |





