








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1342 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 439 matches | ||
| Premier | 250 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11007 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,457 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9887 | 31% |
| Smokes | 9432 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4998 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 7140 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,345,292 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1121 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jishoa | 64% | 94 |
| #2 | fArt | 62% | 81 |
| #3 | kommi666 | 61% | 75 |
| #4 | tarquin | 61% | 114 |
| #5 | 1gedz | 60% | 326 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | BAGELS- | 57% | 245 |
| #11 | traditions | 56% | 102 |
| #12 | bdizzle™∞105ms | 55% | 106 |
| #13 | jackson4th | 53% | 272 |
| #14 | Fredrick™ | 38% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bango | 29 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | 1gedz | 14 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | bdizzle™∞105ms | 11 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | BAGELS- | 9 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | jackson4th | 8 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bango | 1402 | 0.18 | 35 min |
| #2 | 1gedz | 1338 | 0.20 | 31 min |
| #3 | jackson4th | 946 | 0.16 | 23 min |
| #4 | BAGELS- | 917 | 0.19 | 23 min |
| #5 | fArt | 662 | 0.37 | 20 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oomi | +2.57 | 88 | 58 |
| #2 | n1 N1h0N | +1.49 | 89 | 65 |
| #3 | jishoa | +1.00 | 76 | 67 |
| #4 | 1gedz | +0.96 | 74 | 56 |
| #5 | BAGELS- | +0.83 | 82 | 60 |





