










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 104 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
324 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 490 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 194 | 40% |
| Smokes | 91 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 114 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 91 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $104,551 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | indominus | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | 3 Weter | 75% | 12 |
| #3 | Bobbyyy | 64% | 11 |
| #4 | feelingkindasilly | 64% | 11 |
| #5 | MariusEP | 61% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | feelingkindasilly | 64% | 11 |
| #5 | MariusEP | 61% | 18 |
| #6 | Cocio | 58% | 19 |
| #7 | Den levende cookie | 50% | 2 |
| #8 | Peugeot | 50% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MariusEP | 4 | 0.0135 |
| #2 | 3 Weter | 2 | 0.0117 |
| #3 | Cocio | 1 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Bobbyyy | 1 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cocio | 68 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #2 | Bobbyyy | 41 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #3 | 3 Weter | 39 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #4 | Peugeot | 20 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| #5 | MariusEP | 19 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 3 Weter | +8.67 | 52 | 44 |
| #2 | Aizen | +4.31 | 65 | 42 |
| #3 | Cocio | +3.50 | 52 | 49 |
| #4 | Bobbyyy | -0.17 | 54 | 39 |
| #5 | Den levende cookie | -0.22 | 28 | 56 |





