








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 243 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2206 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,113 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2928 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3713 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1553 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 2919 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,033,265 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 166 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dr. Box | 62% | 29 |
| #2 | Rikuhachima Aru | 48% | 233 |
| #3 | masterbait | 47% | 79 |
| #4 | doot | 46% | 243 |
| #5 | Snowmoon | 44% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Minakami Yuki | 44% | 176 |
| #7 | Roy from Boccher | 41% | 70 |
| #8 | doot | 40% | 47 |
| #9 | puru | 40% | 50 |
| #10 | Kayoko | 39% | 182 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rikuhachima Aru | 7 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | doot | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Minakami Yuki | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Kayoko | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | masterbait | 2 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rikuhachima Aru | 1066 | 0.23 | 23 min |
| #2 | doot | 1019 | 0.21 | 25 min |
| #3 | Minakami Yuki | 624 | 0.18 | 15 min |
| #4 | Kayoko | 379 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #5 | masterbait | 248 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | doot | +5.68 | 72 | 57 |
| #2 | doot | +5.39 | 71 | 54 |
| #3 | Dr. Box | +5.04 | 65 | 56 |
| #4 | masterbait | +0.11 | 44 | 55 |
| #5 | Minakami Yuki | -0.36 | 51 | 51 |





