








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 158 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 496 matches | ||
| Premier | 475 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 91 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




50 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11119 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 33,704 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 16596 | 49% |
| Smokes | 8521 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4807 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 3780 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,837,845 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1923 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lethal | 73% | 118 |
| #2 | S t u r d y | 68% | 72 |
| #3 | bilbus | 62% | 245 |
| #4 | PeachFuzz | 62% | 71 |
| #5 | BuuL ✪ | 61% | 176 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | PeachFuzz | 62% | 71 |
| #5 | BuuL ✪ | 61% | 176 |
| #6 | the diddler | 61% | 186 |
| #7 | PuffcoBtw | 47% | 94 |
| #8 | Thomas Andrew Darnley | 46% | 123 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bilbus | 43 | 0.0089 |
| #2 | the diddler | 14 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | BuuL ✪ | 11 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Thomas Andrew Darnley | 10 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | PuffcoBtw | 9 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PeachFuzz | 806 | 0.53 | 22 min |
| #2 | the diddler | 727 | 0.20 | 19 min |
| #3 | bilbus | 417 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #4 | BuuL ✪ | 369 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #5 | PuffcoBtw | 129 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lethal | +5.58 | 97 | 31 |
| #2 | bilbus | +4.08 | 82 | 46 |
| #3 | S t u r d y | +2.76 | 88 | 23 |
| #4 | the diddler | +2.58 | 65 | 77 |
| #5 | BuuL ✪ | +0.95 | 78 | 56 |





