








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2310 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 306 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 160 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 88 matches | ||
| Faceit | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 69 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




98 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
16269 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 39,078 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11929 | 31% |
| Smokes | 10731 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 8100 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 8318 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,338,021 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1678 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Manan | 81% | 69 |
| #2 | reg | 75% | 206 |
| #3 | Kermit | 74% | 117 |
| #4 | tmk | 72% | 254 |
| #5 | Bayloc | 72% | 176 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dar | 137 | 0.0099 |
| #2 | drow | 51 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | jmss | 44 | 0.0055 |
| #4 | Caz | 24 | 0.0079 |
| #5 | tmk | 23 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | drow | 2961 | 0.17 | 68 min |
| #2 | dar | 1768 | 0.13 | 42 min |
| #3 | jmss | 1630 | 0.20 | 39 min |
| #4 | hunter | 1065 | 0.14 | 29 min |
| #5 | Caz | 560 | 0.19 | 12 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | frowzy | +5.20 | 95 | 61 |
| #2 | tmk | +2.00 | 80 | 49 |
| #3 | drow | +1.23 | 75 | 56 |
| #4 | repTiLia | +0.69 | 93 | 65 |
| #5 | jmss | +0.51 | 83 | 57 |





