








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 464 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 282 matches | ||
| Premier | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4805 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,937 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6044 | 38% |
| Smokes | 3949 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2632 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 3312 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $552,581 of utility $60 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 312 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M1nebr0 // LFT | 66% | 44 |
| #2 | VoidZ | 64% | 50 |
| #3 | snaze^ | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | 3dit | 60% | 157 |
| #5 | Rudenessâ†| 58% | 263 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | VoidZ | 64% | 50 |
| #3 | snaze^ | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | 3dit | 60% | 157 |
| #5 | Rudenessâ†| 58% | 263 |
| #6 | TheNorthernDaddy | 53% | 154 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rudenessâ†| 6 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | 3dit | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | TheNorthernDaddy | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #4 | M1nebr0 // LFT | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 3dit | 492 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #2 | Rudenessâ†| 400 | 0.07 | 13 min |
| #3 | TheNorthernDaddy | 329 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #4 | VoidZ | 151 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | M1nebr0 // LFT | 118 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ðannaggiArmandoâ | +3.07 | 84 | 69 |
| #2 | snaze^ | +2.83 | 71 | 64 |
| #3 | VoidZ | +2.32 | 76 | 65 |
| #4 | M1nebr0 // LFT | +1.89 | 87 | 55 |
| #5 | 3dit | +1.17 | 68 | 66 |





