








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 294 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 477 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 76 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4408 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,020 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3997 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4046 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 5920 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 4057 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,605,012 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1574 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gr3cco | 57% | 65 |
| #2 | FireBee | 52% | 197 |
| #3 | ♥ GilletteBee | 47% | 291 |
| #4 | SchnickS | 47% | 165 |
| #5 | Scooby | 45% | 198 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Scooby | 45% | 198 |
| #6 | ♛ Baal.i. | 44% | 156 |
| #7 | ♥ king^^ | 43% | 300 |
| #8 | ♦ Nik™ - iwnl | 41% | 167 |
| #9 | ♥ aLGo.klaeriker | 39% | 109 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FireBee | 11 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | ♥ GilletteBee | 10 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | ♦ Nik™ - iwnl | 9 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Scooby | 7 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | SchnickS | 7 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Scooby | 526 | 0.12 | 15 min |
| #2 | FireBee | 412 | 0.10 | 13 min |
| #3 | ♥ GilletteBee | 411 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| #4 | ♦ Nik™ - iwnl | 297 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #5 | ♥ aLGo.klaeriker | 267 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FireBee | +3.25 | 85 | 60 |
| #2 | ♥ aLGo.klaeriker | +2.55 | 85 | 60 |
| #3 | ♥ GilletteBee | +0.89 | 72 | 62 |
| #4 | SchnickS | +0.42 | 80 | 68 |
| #5 | ♛ Baal.i. | -0.30 | 65 | 62 |





