








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 61 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 77 matches | ||
| Premier | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1531 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,348 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2146 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1776 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2358 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2068 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $271,642 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 111 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Annex | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | nLk | 62% | 105 |
| #3 | renegerd | 61% | 117 |
| #4 | Hoax🍋 | 60% | 130 |
| #5 | Niya | 60% | 121 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Collynzen | 57% | 28 |
| #7 | hAcky | 57% | 30 |
| #8 | dreaNN_ | 55% | 22 |
| #9 | Jay2k1 | 38% | 8 |
| #10 | Voltage | 27% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | renegerd | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | nLk | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Hoax🍋 | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Niya | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | Annex | 1 | 0.0056 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nLk | 322 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #2 | Niya | 255 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | Hoax🍋 | 200 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #4 | renegerd | 173 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #5 | Collynzen | 118 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nLk | +3.96 | 87 | 83 |
| #2 | dreaNN_ | +2.77 | 79 | 59 |
| #3 | Collynzen | +2.67 | 72 | 68 |
| #4 | Voltage | +2.39 | 66 | 47 |
| #5 | Annex | +2.34 | 93 | 66 |





