








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 223 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 414 matches | ||
| Premier | 156 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5602 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,042 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5641 | 26% |
| Smokes | 6500 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 5059 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4842 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,713,223 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 294 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⚡ | 56% | 80 |
| #2 | rod | 56% | 59 |
| #3 | Rave | 55% | 65 |
| #4 | Matt | 54% | 68 |
| #5 | crazy | 53% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | 77th | Ed | 49% | 116 |
| #10 | pem | 48% | 212 |
| #11 | Section | 48% | 40 |
| #12 | geedis | 47% | 57 |
| #13 | CoolAdam | 46% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gryph0n | 15 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | pem | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | i love my new pet Scimmione | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | ⚡ | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | rod | 4 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gryph0n | 2639 | 0.24 | 73 min |
| #2 | i love my new pet Scimmione | 619 | 0.20 | 16 min |
| #3 | 77th | Ed | 454 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #4 | Matt | 336 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #5 | ⚡ | 275 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Section | +2.16 | 80 | 69 |
| #2 | rod | +1.95 | 81 | 68 |
| #3 | ⚡ | +1.39 | 88 | 54 |
| #4 | geedis | +1.32 | 74 | 63 |
| #5 | Matt | +0.63 | 72 | 60 |





