








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 324 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 101 matches | ||
| Premier | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1615 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,154 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 292 | 9% |
| Smokes | 415 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 1288 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 1159 | 37% |
Our logs show you have wasted $164,118 of utility $44 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 251 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Karen | 64% | 22 |
| #2 | Virta | 64% | 22 |
| #3 | janoistensankari | 63% | 63 |
| #4 | Pel<tsi | 53% | 141 |
| #5 | Ailu | 50% | 121 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | washed | 43% | 77 |
| #8 | Blank | 40% | 48 |
| #9 | IMA | 37% | 19 |
| #10 | KurkuGoesPro | 33% | 15 |
| #11 | ✪dgm<3♛ #kung | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pel<tsi | 47 | 0.0160 |
| #2 | Ailu | 27 | 0.0109 |
| #3 | washed | 23 | 0.0144 |
| #4 | Blank | 13 | 0.0136 |
| #5 | janoistensankari | 11 | 0.0085 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ailu | 196 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #2 | Pel<tsi | 147 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #3 | washed | 125 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | janoistensankari | 111 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Johannes | 108 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KurkuGoesPro | +4.90 | 90 | 56 |
| #2 | Ailu | +4.66 | 95 | 52 |
| #3 | Karen | +4.49 | 92 | 49 |
| #4 | Virta | +2.81 | 83 | 59 |
| #5 | Pel<tsi | +1.17 | 83 | 31 |





