








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1364 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 498 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 193 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 73 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




162 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10289 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,979 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4239 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3571 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 4462 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3707 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $831,802 of utility $45 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 931 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | janoistensankari | 55% | 247 |
| #2 | Ailu | 55% | 492 |
| #3 | Johannes | 55% | 121 |
| #4 | KurkuGoesPro | 54% | 48 |
| #5 | Virta | 53% | 216 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | jdi | 53% | 141 |
| #7 | Karen | 53% | 276 |
| #8 | washed | 51% | 572 |
| #9 | ✪dgm<3♛ #kung | 50% | 129 |
| #10 | Blank | 49% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | washed | 118 | 0.0099 |
| #2 | Ailu | 58 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | Virta | 33 | 0.0074 |
| #4 | jdi | 28 | 0.0098 |
| #5 | Johannes | 28 | 0.0117 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ailu | 959 | 0.10 | 25 min |
| #2 | washed | 957 | 0.08 | 18 min |
| #3 | Karen | 572 | 0.10 | 13 min |
| #4 | Virta | 509 | 0.11 | 14 min |
| #5 | janoistensankari | 431 | 0.08 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ailu | +3.39 | 92 | 61 |
| #2 | KurkuGoesPro | +3.36 | 84 | 64 |
| #3 | Karen | +2.52 | 86 | 58 |
| #4 | Pel<tsi | +0.98 | 76 | 41 |
| #5 | Virta | +0.62 | 79 | 64 |





