








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 600 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 351 matches | ||
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3993 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,227 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6763 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2256 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 5937 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 4271 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $946,486 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 339 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | biktor | 56% | 70 |
| #2 | Thunberg | 54% | 56 |
| #3 | Lar74 | 49% | 195 |
| #4 | Max | 47% | 57 |
| #5 | Pizz | 47% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Olsson | 45% | 164 |
| #9 | Jonken | 44% | 152 |
| #10 | Berkan62 | 42% | 60 |
| #11 | Förbannat | 41% | 56 |
| #12 | Elon Musk | 41% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Elon Musk | 17 | 0.0081 |
| #2 | Lar74 | 10 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Olsson | 7 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | biktor | 7 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | Berkan62 | 6 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Elon Musk | 415 | 0.20 | 11 min |
| #2 | biktor | 397 | 0.27 | 8 min |
| #3 | Olsson | 364 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #4 | Thunberg | 351 | 0.28 | 7 min |
| #5 | Jonken | 283 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thunberg | +3.45 | 88 | 70 |
| #2 | Max | +3.05 | 82 | 62 |
| #3 | Elon Musk | +2.48 | 87 | 66 |
| #4 | biktor | +1.39 | 67 | 65 |
| #5 | Berkan62 | +1.14 | 78 | 49 |





