








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 785 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 498 matches | ||
| Faceit | 62 matches | ||
| Wingman | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




60 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7776 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,970 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8295 | 33% |
| Smokes | 5900 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 5565 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 5210 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,466,519 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2242 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Förbannat | 51% | 67 |
| #2 | B1tchter | 49% | 80 |
| #3 | Thunberg | 48% | 87 |
| #4 | biktor | 46% | 192 |
| #5 | Pizz | 46% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Jonken | 41% | 226 |
| #11 | Olsson | 40% | 89 |
| #12 | Lar74 | 40% | 276 |
| #13 | Ogrecrabs | 39% | 82 |
| #14 | Donkey | 38% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jonken | 16 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | Max | 14 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | Berkan62 | 14 | 0.0069 |
| #4 | Lar74 | 13 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | biktor | 12 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | biktor | 892 | 0.23 | 21 min |
| #2 | Thunberg | 446 | 0.24 | 9 min |
| #3 | Jonken | 346 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #4 | Max | 318 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #5 | Peel ♥ | 282 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thunberg | +2.76 | 93 | 69 |
| #2 | Elon Musk | +2.00 | 84 | 68 |
| #3 | Max | +1.88 | 78 | 56 |
| #4 | B1tchter | +0.41 | 67 | 47 |
| #5 | Berkan62 | +0.39 | 79 | 47 |





