








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 391 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 267 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Esplay | 1 match | 1,705 |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4488 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,752 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3347 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2392 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2689 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2324 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,627,500 of utility $199 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 143 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pizz | 59% | 82 |
| #2 | Thunberg | 55% | 20 |
| #3 | Daydreamer | 55% | 22 |
| #4 | Ogrecrabs | 53% | 117 |
| #5 | RayCapo | 53% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Elon Musk | 13 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | biktor | 8 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | Lar74 | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Jonken | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | RayCapo | 3 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Elon Musk | 646 | 0.21 | 20 min |
| #2 | biktor | 562 | 0.27 | 13 min |
| #3 | RayCapo | 321 | 0.42 | 8 min |
| #4 | Ogrecrabs | 241 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #5 | Peel ♥ | 159 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thunberg | +3.61 | 95 | 73 |
| #2 | RayCapo | +2.99 | 85 | 70 |
| #3 | Max | +2.41 | 79 | 57 |
| #4 | Daydreamer | +1.61 | 85 | 67 |
| #5 | Elon Musk | +0.86 | 82 | 67 |





