








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 734 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 228 matches | ||
| Premier | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3897 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,927 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3385 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3752 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 5783 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 5007 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,926,845 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 323 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TikTak | 53% | 73 |
| #2 | аугстаак | 52% | 200 |
| #3 | ///客人是同性恋/// | 50% | 225 |
| #4 | Ali | 49% | 251 |
| #5 | Ariels | 48% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Ariels | 48% | 92 |
| #6 | raikstonen | 46% | 68 |
| #7 | sewey | 45% | 307 |
| #8 | Chimaty ⛟ | 41% | 143 |
| #9 | Emiljons | 33% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ///客人是同性恋/// | 22 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | TikTak | 13 | 0.0086 |
| #3 | Ali | 8 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | аугстаак | 8 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | sewey | 6 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ali | 930 | 0.18 | 26 min |
| #2 | аугстаак | 796 | 0.19 | 20 min |
| #3 | ///客人是同性恋/// | 609 | 0.13 | 12 min |
| #4 | Chimaty ⛟ | 399 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #5 | sewey | 329 | 0.05 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ali | +3.58 | 68 | 75 |
| #2 | ///客人是同性恋/// | +3.17 | 70 | 61 |
| #3 | TikTak | +2.41 | 82 | 64 |
| #4 | аугстаак | +1.41 | 74 | 63 |
| #5 | Ariels | -0.50 | 54 | 38 |





