








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 142 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
640 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,395 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 395 | 28% |
| Smokes | 189 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 582 | 42% |
| Molotovs | 229 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $421,216 of utility $294 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 160 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kitten | 68% | 19 |
| #2 | Jimmy D Fried | 58% | 19 |
| #3 | tyo | 57% | 7 |
| #4 | Zfunk | 52% | 58 |
| #5 | KohZe | 51% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Zfunk | 52% | 58 |
| #5 | KohZe | 51% | 73 |
| #6 | Swordfish 13 | 45% | 11 |
| #7 | jord | 45% | 31 |
| #8 | Sachburger | 38% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zfunk | 6 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | KohZe | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | jord | 3 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | Kitten | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KohZe | 153 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #2 | Zfunk | 116 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | jord | 100 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | Sachburger | 64 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | Jimmy D Fried | 54 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sachburger | +1.37 | 75 | 60 |
| #2 | Zfunk | +0.79 | 67 | 54 |
| #3 | haru | +0.77 | 46 | 53 |
| #4 | KohZe | +0.36 | 72 | 62 |
| #5 | Swordfish 13 | -0.04 | 57 | 44 |





