








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 584 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 226 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




117 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6929 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,438 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7592 | 28% |
| Smokes | 6915 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 6240 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 6691 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $949,789 of utility $67 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 61 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | MilkyDurag | 60% | 98 |
| #8 | Anti | 60% | 103 |
| #9 | Leodyn | 58% | 120 |
| #10 | MaddHands | 54% | 457 |
| #11 | 𝕀ℂ𝕐シ | 50% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MaddHands | 66 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | Leodyn | 30 | 0.0123 |
| #3 | Toestiir | 21 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | Anti | 15 | 0.0075 |
| #5 | zylox | 15 | 0.0080 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MaddHands | 1570 | 0.17 | 40 min |
| #2 | Anti | 485 | 0.24 | 14 min |
| #3 | psychopomp | 328 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| #4 | Leodyn | 317 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #5 | Toestiir | 297 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anti | +4.26 | 86 | 72 |
| #2 | ✦︎ Lyme ✦ | +3.54 | 85 | 65 |
| #3 | Leodyn | +2.92 | 93 | 51 |
| #4 | BALD-PEEK Leo | +2.21 | 81 | 47 |
| #5 | zylox | +1.33 | 76 | 53 |





