










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1018 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Ancient | 233 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 182 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 181 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




192 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6840 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 38,242 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11173 | 29% |
| Smokes | 12117 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 7663 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 7289 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $969,345 of utility $65 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 447 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SeniFknWaffle | 66% | 276 |
| #2 | JimFknMy | 64% | 342 |
| #3 | Isma06 | 63% | 161 |
| #4 | k11 | 62% | 328 |
| #5 | quique404 | 61% | 93 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Tirpa | 56% | 278 |
| #8 | Domimola | 56% | 68 |
| #9 | PeFknLongui | 53% | 114 |
| #10 | ✪ Dvϟ | 52% | 52 |
| #11 | buho | 51% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JoFknLines | 82 | 0.0057 |
| #2 | SeniFknWaffle | 55 | 0.0104 |
| #3 | PeFknLongui | 18 | 0.0086 |
| #4 | JimFknMy | 16 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Isma06 | 15 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JoFknLines | 3235 | 0.22 | 96 min |
| #2 | k11 | 589 | 0.09 | 13 min |
| #3 | Tirpa | 525 | 0.09 | 11 min |
| #4 | SeniFknWaffle | 514 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #5 | JimFknMy | 477 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JoFknLines | +3.40 | 72 | 77 |
| #2 | SimonFknSay | +1.10 | 68 | 65 |
| #3 | SeniFknWaffle | +0.85 | 63 | 58 |
| #4 | Domimola | +0.81 | 83 | 59 |
| #5 | JimFknMy | +0.74 | 68 | 59 |





