








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1035 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 174 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 68 matches | ||
| Wingman | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 46 matches | ||
| Premier | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




54 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7772 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,592 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5157 | 22% |
| Smokes | 6399 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5820 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 6216 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,595,778 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 785 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | flux | 67% | 69 |
| #2 | stoopid high | 65% | 37 |
| #3 | twink | 64% | 188 |
| #4 | save | 64% | 42 |
| #5 | sushi | 64% | 208 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Decadenza | 515 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| #2 | twink | 498 | 0.13 | 15 min |
| #3 | Collynzen | 494 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #4 | -Mat_ | 478 | 0.23 | 13 min |
| #5 | Fuwa #SlavaUkraini | 339 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ai | +2.50 | 82 | 65 |
| #2 | nLk | +2.43 | 88 | 74 |
| #3 | Decadenza | +2.02 | 88 | 68 |
| #4 | -Mat_ | +1.93 | 75 | 75 |
| #5 | twink | +1.32 | 81 | 64 |





