








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 158 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 156 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2690 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,534 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2940 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2885 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1980 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2729 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $402,289 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 69 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DeathB1ade | 90% | 41 |
| #2 | PapaP | 80% | 25 |
| #3 | c6x | 75% | 40 |
| #4 | flux | 72% | 25 |
| #5 | twink | 68% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | Lucid | 56% | 34 |
| #14 | Collynzen | 55% | 11 |
| #15 | Zenith | 42% | 12 |
| #16 | Fuwa #SlavaUkraini | 41% | 27 |
| #17 | #1 Bottom Fragger UK | 25% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DeathB1ade | 17 | 0.0206 |
| #2 | catfood | 16 | 0.0092 |
| #3 | twink | 13 | 0.0071 |
| #4 | PapaP | 12 | 0.0249 |
| #5 | thok | 9 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ai | 307 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #2 | twink | 209 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #3 | Samsung | 145 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | catfood | 143 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | thok | 132 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PapaP | +2.38 | 87 | 58 |
| #2 | -Mat_ | +2.32 | 77 | 73 |
| #3 | DeathB1ade | +2.05 | 83 | 48 |
| #4 | c6x | +1.47 | 53 | 52 |
| #5 | Lucid | +1.29 | 83 | 59 |





